ALASKA DELIVERANCE

BMW Rolls-Royce

AeroEngines

ALASKA DELIVERANCE

A Journey To The End Of The Earth

A B717-200 Trip Report

Anthony Tellier

Prologue: Cold Bay, Alaska has a lot going for it. High winds, bitter cold ... and a new bar.

„YOU DON’T NEED TO BE A WEATHERMAN TO TELL WHICH WAY THE WIND BLOWS .... „[1]

It blows for Thee.

A couple of the local GOBs[2] said that in January they had „seventy-knot winds. Today’s pretty nice.“ Really. One of the ramp gang said that while he had not been in Cold Bay when the record was set, he HAD seen minus seventy (F). I neglected to determine if this was a contemporaneous event with the winds of the same number.

The hottest it gets is in the ‘70s. Plus ‘70s, that is.

WEATHER COMPARISON

Your worst fears ... confirmed!

Yuma, AZ

Hottest US City based on Normal Daily Maximum: 87.9F (#1)

Hottest US City based on Record Temperature: 124F (#1)

Percent of Maximum Possible Sunshine (%): 90% (#1)

Cold Bay, AK

Most Number of Rain Days (.01 or more): 226 (#3)

Cloudiest Cities - Mean # of Days: 305 (#1)

Most Windy US Cities based on Average Wind Speed: 16.9 (#3)

Note: the day that we were there, there was no:

Clouds (OK, a little)

Wind (OK, some ... under 15 knots)

Rain (none ... a little snow flurry or three, however)

OUR TOWN

Cold Bay has 85 residents and twelve kids ... who are being educated in a K-thru-12 school. They learn the Three Rs: Rifles, Roughin’ It and Rime Ice. „Flash“ Gordon and I got the quick tour.

We saw the gasoline pump;

We saw the Post Office;

We saw the chapel (!);

We saw the tsunami warning siren on the old fire house;

We saw the clinic ... no MD, only an EMT;

We visited the General Store/Trading Post which is attached to the new bar which abuts the hotel which sports eight rooms plus a remote bunk house, pardner.

The bar had a fine selection of expensive Scotch whiskeys and a wide range of imported and specialty beers. The large room was wood-paneled and decorated with (what else) mounted heads of game animals. Over the U-shaped bar were mounted scores of small ... 6“ diameter ... Japanese glass fishing net floats. They stopped using these in the ‘60s but self-proclaimed „John, The Fat Cook“ said that he could load up a (Cessna) 170 to the weight limit out on some beaches „in twenty minutes“. The original bar burned down a few years past .. a sorry day in Cold Bay history, for sure!

John is not fat, however, but he is the:

Mayor („They appointed me. I guess it was my turn ... in the barrel“)

Barkeep

Hotel Manager

Store Manager

Roving Ambassador Of Goodwill

„I’m settin’ up a web site“, he threatened. „www.coldbay.com“?

THE END

Virtually all cars and trucks in town have had their doors flung open by the high winds (see above) so hard that there are distinct creases along the doors and crumpled fender edges. „Yeah, it’s our signature“ they told us.

The local jet fuel company was the aptly-named „Frosty Fuels“ which actually did not reflect the weather but, rather, Mount Frosty nestling behind the runway. The runway is a two-mile legacy from the Second World War.

COLD BAY DODGERS
A beater Dodge pick-em-up was rented from „Cold Bay Truck Rental“, Spencer Paxton - owner. The truck was brush-painted a bright red over the original white. Spencer is a big ol’ boy! Like as in „BIG!“ His office over the Quonset hut „Reeve Air“ terminal was quite „lived in“, so to speak. If you catch my meaning; if you get my drift. Lots of cigarette butts in the corners, for example.

The airport terminal had a map of the roads around Cold Bay. All four of them. Access to the area is either by sea or by air. There were no fast-food franchises in Cold Bay. No SoCal fern bars. I bet you can smoke all you want in the bar. Which is the restaurant. The airport counter lady gave me two „Reeve Air“ pins: Lockheed Electras. I bought a Russell Creek/Cold Bay Salmon Derby T-shirt ... the seven bucks goes for the EMT fund.

Cell phone access was non-existent. I had to make a biz call to Yuma and they said that the phones did not work but I could see if Spencer’s did. He said that he had been trying to reach his mother and sister in Arkansas (Hint: there are no „natives“ ... only transplants either hiding out or dysfunctional?) and the phone was out. I tried it and reached Yuma on the first try. I forked over a ten spot for the privilege. Spence then tried Arkansas and it was a no go again.

SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER

The address of the local hobby shop is C12H22O11 ... grain alcohol and its many derivatives.

THE RESTLESS EARTH

The flight from Anchorage brought us over a chain of stratovolcanoes that were perfect cones a la Mount Fuji in Japan. Unfortunately none of the peaks were smoking or erupting or flowing. Bummer. We flew right by these mountains that make up that portion of the Pacific „Ring Of Fire“. Every man-jack and his dog was at the left side windows snapping candid shots ... even the professional photographer! Bear had to re-trim the aircraft!

We saw frozen pack ice and nary a road or trail or building from Anchorage to Cold Bay ... a flight of two hours. And no trees other than the Town Tree in Cold Bay, a wistful one pine.

TESTED ... AND NOT FOUND WANTING

The Sundstrand and McBoeing guys force-fed the APU with pounds and kilos of fresh, raw snow via a rotary blower stationed on the left hand engine pylon. They wisely kept motor #2 at idle while they tried to choke the power unit. And they did, once. (Frosty Fuels had no air cart nor a power stinger ... so a re-start of anything had to come from within, since they were without.)

D ICED

We had the Anchorage FBO de-ice the wings. Man, that nozzle blows a lot of fluid ... into the moteurs. Not a problem (of course!).

“BOING” FIELD

Seattle was dreary, drizzly and damp. Normal. We did a self-guided walk-through of a flight test 777 ... as big as the LA Forum inside, but without a Shaq attack. Then we commandeered a Company bus to take six of us to the Museum Of Flight. We just waltzed in like we owned the place, avoiding the $8 (per head) entrance fee.

AHT

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